I want you back.

"This is my home

This is where I belong

Where my daughters go to school

Where opinions are strong

Where my neighbours are my friends

And the story never ends."

♥

Scary night.

The other night I couldn't sleep properly. At 5am I got up, when I came back to my room, I was sat in my bed and I looked at the end of my room and I saw you standing there. In the clothes you are in now, and with the big cheesy smile across your face. I know it's you watching over me, but it's scary. As much as I want you back again, I know I can't see you. Please don't scare me again Daddy. If you're worried that I'll forget what you look like or what you sound like, you don't have to, because I could never forget my favourite man. Never in a million years. I love you.

Do me a favour?

This is getting so much harder. I miss you so much more every day. The pain gets worse every day. I'm reminded of you by everything. Please come home Daddy?! I miss you so fucking much! You're supposed to be here with us, drinking on Friday's and going down to the meeting place. Sitting in and watching dvds together. Having our big favourite dinners together. (After all, you were the best chef.) But this new life just isn't right for me. I'm used to being with you every day and every night. I know you're watching over me, please make this easier for me?

Time heals everything.

It's been just over two months that you have been gone and I thought I was okay and doing good. People say as time goes on, things get easier. But it's the other way round. I'm finding it so hard without you now and as time passes by, I get more hurt by it. I feel upset twenty-four seven. I can't even talk to people anymore. I keep to myself. Daddy, help me be myself again, even if it is the hardest thing to do without you.

Gossip guuuurl 101.

"OMG! Why are you friends with her?" "Are ye friends?" "Their bff's." "Look at them being friends!" OH MY GOOD GOD! Yes, we are friends. Yes, bad things happened. But you know what? Fuck it. It's my life, I can choose whoever I want as a friend. Just because we're talking, doesn't mean we're "bff's" or chatting every day about everything and telling each other our secrets. Sit down and shut the fuck up, that's what you can do instead of judging like you always do.

Go away and fuck yourself.

I'm not a paralyzed five year old. I can control my own life, I don't need you to do it for me. Two faced bitch.

My man.

I was your little baby girl. You couldn't have another girl in your life because we had such a bond. You were my rock star. I couldn't have a favourite artist because you had such an amazing voice. You were there for me every time I needed you. The day I woke up and you were gone was my biggest nightmare ever. It still hasn't hit me yet but I'm getting used to the fact that you were taken from us. I want to run home to Ard na Corann and lay on your bed and chat to you for hours listening to music. I want to tell you everything stupid us girls say so you can take the piss out of them. I want to go out to the pub and dance with you. I want to have your chicken curry and rice. I want cuddles from my Daddy. Every girl does. So save your arms for when the day comes for me to go up there, and never let me go. I have my heart wrapped around you. I love you Daddy, and I miss you. My best friend. 27/4/66 - 21/1/12. <3 xxx