Really.

I'm okay, I am. I'm happy and alive. I like being single and being able to do whatever the fuck I like. There's just one thing I miss, I miss having someone to cuddle. I don't want a relationship, I just want a cuddle partner. I guess it takes time, right?

Exactly right.

Style of your hair, shape of your eyes and your nose, the way you stare as if you see, right through to my soul, It's your left hand and the way that it's not quite as big as your right, the way you stand in the mirror

before we go out at night. Our quiet time, your beautiful mind, they're a part of the list. Things that I miss. Things like your funny little laugh, the way you smile or the way we kiss. What I noticed is this, I come up with something new, every single time that I sit and reminisce. The way you sweet smell lingers when you leave a room. Stories you tell as we lay in bed all afternoon. I dreamed you now every night in my mind is where we meet. And when I'm awake staring at pictures of you asleep. Touching your face, invading your space. They're a part of the list. Things that I miss. Things like your funny little laugh, the way you smile or the way we kiss. What I noticed is this, I come up with something new, every single time that I sit and reminisce. And you'll live in my memories forever more I swear. They're a part of the list. Things that I miss. Things like your funny little laugh, the way you smile, or the way we kiss. What I noticed is this, I come up with something new, every single time that I sit and reminisce.

Now.

And fucking kiss me.

Yes I do.

Shit yes I have a story. It would take about three books to even explain my story. Some parts good, some parts bad. But that's what a story is all about, right?

Shit.

I fucking miss you.

Whoa re you playing?

You broke up with your girlfriend, and I broke up with my boyfriend. You go to Spain for a month and say when you come back you want to be with me. I was delighted. You told me to tell Buddy that I like you. To see what he says. You said we will work on them accepting the idea when you get back. But then the girl you were with said you guys were talking about getting back together when you get back. Since then you've been acting weird towards me. Not your normal self. So you know what? When you get back, you have two choices. Have me or leave me. But I am not going to be your girl on the side any more. If you don't want me then that's fine. I will live my life and eventually find myself someone else. Right now, while you're in Spain, I'm going to be single and be happy. :) So fuck you, but I still like you. And btw, I miss you.

And it starts all over again.

After our secret had gotten out we weren't allowed to talk to each other anymore. Which is fair enough. But you have no idea how much I wanted to talk to you. Then one night I was lying in bed and I got a text. It was you. After that text we started texting all the time again. I went up to Clara, and as soon as I got there I walked into Buddy's room and all the lads were there. I looked around and said hi to everyone. Then I saw your face. I smiled and walked out. Me, Gemma and Buddy went to get drink. The night rolled on and we got drunk and had more fun. You kept staring at me all night, and making comments about me. I didn't know how to react. It was kind of awkward. Buddy was watching every step we took. I couldn't go near you. So I hardly spoke to you. You guys left at 4.30am. After you left you text me. "are you akwake?" after we got texting you told me I looked beautiful and you couldn't stop looking at me. I fell asleep texting you. The next day Lee, Christy and Pa came round. Buddy and Gemma went off, Lee got drunk and commerd, so I was sitting in the kitchen with the lads playing card games. Christy gave me his bracelet, and Pa was hugging me. Then I looked up and you walked in. Then I had to start drinking more to get my mind off you. Everyone turned up at the house during the night. It was just me, you, Sca and Lee left. You text me off Sca's phone. We planned to go into the room later when Bud and Gem was asleep. 6am, I decided to go to bed. I stayed awake texting you, then I heard a knock at my window. I looked out it and you were there. I opened it and you kissed me. I smiled and you kissed me again. 7am, I hear my door open, I see you standing there. So I sit up and you smile at me and say I look beautiful in bed. You joined me in bed, and we had sex. Then we just lay in bed, talking and hugging. You held my hand and kissed my forehead over a million times. You said sweet things to me, and made me laugh. We had sex again, and then you just lay there holding me in your arms. We didn't talk for a while. My head on your chest, listening to your heart beat. You were stroking my arm. It was amazing. Then you kissed my head and whispered "I like you." If only you saw the smile on my face as I whispered "I like you too." Everything you said that night goes through my head every day. It was magical.